Do You Have a Sex Starved Marriage?
Having a sex starved marriage can be an extremely difficult situation for a number of reasons. A sex starved marriage can lead to sexual temptation (I Corinthians 7:5), feelings of abandonment, feeling of insecurity, a low self worth, or feelings of inadequacy.
Paul addressed this issue in I Corinthians 7 as he wrote the following in verses 2 thru 5:
2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
Why Some have a Sex Starved Marriage?
It should be understood that there are often a variety of reasons as to why some couples have a sex starved marriage. However, here are a few to consider:
1. Sex is to be a physical expression of what has been going on all day long between a man and a woman. If they have not been connecting on a mental, emotional, and a spiritual level, it makes it all the more difficult for them to gel on a physical level.
2. Tiredness can take a woman out of the picture quicker than anything. Though this can also affect a man, it should be noted that when a woman is tired, it is rather difficult for her to excel in the area of physical intimacy.
3. When a woman is having a baby or nursing, she can also experience a change in her libido. It is at these times that couples should be sure to communicate their feelings and adjust their expectations to reasonable levels.
4. If one or both participants are participating in pornography, self-pleasing, or any type of illicit behavior, there will, many times, be a change in how sex is enjoyed between a husband and wife. Couples should be sure to abide by the following rule in order to keep their marriage pure from such obstacles: no secrets from one another.
5. Busyness is another culprit to having a sex starved marriage. In other posts and articles we deal with how to keep sex alive in spite of having a busy schedule.
Hi , I’m current in A VERY BAD Place in My Marriage, There’s No infidelity , No Drugs , No Pornography , & No Physical Abuse . But My Wife Keep Me From Having intimacy With her for Months @ A Time & This is REALLY Hurting & Affecting Me . She’s Always Tier & Has Stress @ her job But I Don’t Think it’s Fair to Reject me her husband for months @ A Time & Neglect her Role As A Wife To Me . Please help Me With Answers & Prayers for I don’t want Sin To Come in & destory Us & My Heart To Become Cold Towards her . Thank You Very Much
My concern is my spouse hygiene. He showers upon my request. It is the only way I will allow Emotional or physical intimacy. Problem is I’m frustrated with making the request. He knows the importance of hygiene for me but will lay in bed smelling like a two hour work out in the sun and want me to lay beside him. I’m Totally Turned off. It is killing our marriage. Im accused of beinh controlling and nagging. I don’t know what else to do. Please offer suggestions.
Positive reinforcement? Maybe a sensual shower together? After he showers and smells good, tell him how sexy his clean skin smells and feels for you. Positive reinforcement is generally more effective than negative. 🙂 Good luck!