After 25 Years Of Marriage – This Is What We Have Learned



This December, my wife and I will have been married for 25 years. I am more than thankful for the lessons we have learned along the way.


A Few Lessons We Have Learned


Though we are certainly not the Corn-flake couple, here are a few things that I believe have helped us to reach this milestone.


1. When we were first married, we were told to never go to bed mad at each other. But, we have found that it’s okay. We usually feel much different in the morning anyway.

Yes, I am very aware of that verse that says to not let the sun go down on your wrath. But, we have also found that we can go to bed in faith knowing that forgiveness and a little sleep has a way of bridging the gap in our hearts that our late-night logical surmisings fail to do. Also, if you have to break five commands to keep that one, then maybe it’s okay to sleep it off. Plus, I am not so sure that the verse applies to every little marital tiff right before bedtime.

2. Divorce is not in our vocabulary. I am just absolutely mesmerized at the amount of people that call themselves Christians that throw this word around so loosely. As stated in our marriage book, marriage is a life-long covenant, and time and a piece of paper in a courthouse do not change that fact. I am absolutely convinced that our society is participating in what I call legalized spouse-swapping. Just keeping it real folks, as well as Biblical.

3. I do not argue with a crying woman. We take about 6 pages in our marriage book and about 25 minutes in our conferences to essentially say that.

4. We meditate on the scriptures. The last thing that Christians and churches seem to do is read the Bible and simply obey it. The irony, however, is that this is the most powerful activity in which we can participate. If we gaze upon Him, we will be absolutely everything we need to be in Christ according to Psalm 1:1-3 and II Corinthians 3:18.

5. We have bigger goals than our marriage. We are not great lovers, but fighters together against a common enemy which yields uncommon unity.

6. We recognize that life is not about us. True freedom and joy are only experienced when we are living outside of ourselves and for a much higher purpose than ourselves. This is why Jesus said that he that loses his life shall find it.

7. We believe in simplistic living. Adam and Eve had God, each other, and a garden. That was paradise for them. That said, I am not so sure that we need too much more than our first parents in order to enjoy life.


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