What should a wife do with an embarrassing husband that is too loud, obnoxious, inappropriate in social settings, cutting, or just rude in front of others. Though the cross can be a heavy one to bear, I hope this little bit of marriage advice will help.
He is not You
First off, it should be understood that other people know the difference between you and your husband. Though you may feel as if others are criticizing you in their minds, you are probably slightly misguided in that they understand that he is acting under his own volition. If anything, others probably see exactly what you see, and they understand your plight.
He is not a Reflection of You
Though in a perfect world couples should stick together in purpose and unity, it is helpful in these situation to know that your husband is not necessarily a reflection of you. It is also helpful to know that people know that. Therefore, you do not need to try to recover his reputation, make excuses, or hide out from being seen with him.
Count Your Blessings, Your Cross May Not be as Heavy as Others
If your husband is a little loud, out of touch with other’s feelings, or a social invalid, then you may need to count your blessings. That is, be thankful he is not a drug addict, money launderer, an adulterer, or a jail bird.
In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul said, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” Joy typically comes in life when we learn to make the best of the life we have rather than the life we want. In fact, it was Spurgeon that said, “To whom enough is never plenty, plenty will never be enough.”
Validate Him as a Man
Many times, people act in embarrassing ways because they are seeking the love and attention they missed as a child. Instead of ridiculing an embarrassing husband, you may find it more beneficial to wield what I call the sword of thankfulness and praise. In fact, the more you push an embarrassing husband down, you will find that he will probably act in even more embarrassing ways to either spite you or gain a little more attention.
Ladies I’m using this comment box to say I understand, to vent and pray all at the same time…
Dear husband, you are an amazing man, with a sense of humor that has made me laugh for so many years, you have a servants heart that I admire so much and just this morning I prayed so hard for the Lord to be with you always, I gave thanks for you and realized, I’m truly blessed to have a husband like you…but even though I realize my blessings, tonight I was really hurt and embarrassed about a comment you made that humorously made me sound like a promiscuous women, like an unloved wife and ultimately made yourself look like a jerk, all to make someone laugh; even though the laughter came from his discomfort and embarrassment caused by the words that so casually flowed from your lips. Although I attempted to laugh it off I was silently in shock, hurt that my own husband would joke like this at my expense…
Then when I share with you that I’ve been hurt by your words you fire off at me with anger,disregard and quite honestly don’t seem like the man I prayed for earlier this morning. Ladies what will I do? I was born a warrior of God, a woman of strength… what will I do… I will do what Jesus has done for me…I forgive! With tears rolling down my cheeks…I forgive him, with a heart that has been deeply offended on more than one occasion I forgive and the pray Lord will deal with him in a way that only the father can. I forgive and I will keep loving him.
That is what Jesus would do…
Thankyou
Beautiful
I’m sorry but I have to disagree. My husband still acts childish in many ways both in public and private. It is to the point that I do not like being out in public with him because of his childish behavior. The people in our church even notice his childish behavior. Many in church have avoided us because of it. It’s one thing to act like this in our teens and in our 20s. However, after nearly 30 years of marriage and 4 now adult children, acting childish should not have stayed the norm. 1 Corinthians 13:11 clearly talks about leaving our childish ways behind. How can a person do this if someone does not point it out to them?
Thank you Kim, I agree. I also know that my husbands behavior does reflect on me, and I’m so ashamed at times. His behavior keeps me locked up and has given me a reputation that I cannot move past.